June 8, 2020 © by Judith Allen Shone
What if something happened, if things
were different than they are?
Just how would that be?
What if I’d walked a different path
with someone else?
Would I still be me?
What if I’d lived somewhere else
in another world?
What difference would I see?
What if I’d chosen differently,
how would my life be?
That’s past and not for changing,
but can be for review.
What felt right would be a marker,
what felt wrong would be a clue.
Of the paths that were before me,
the choice was always there.
I picked one, then went that way,
knowing nothing else to do.
I never saw a guiding light;
I never felt a goal.
The only pull I sensed inside
was away from some dark hole—
that abyss that went to nowhere—
with wasted life in full view,
I just kept moving forward,
where I found a love for you
…and you…and you.
The Path © 2020 Judith Allen Shone
“My Love’s diagnosis was over eight years ago — so long ago that the life I left behind has become a blurry mystery.”
Caregiving began for me just three years after our retirement. It is a commitment I fulfill to this day.
My personal story, told in my books “Is There Any Ice Cream?” (© 2019) and “Did You Hide the Cookies?” (© 2020) reveals reflective moments from the unanticipated emotional chaos that emerged while I, alone, was caregiver for My Love who has COPD, Alzheimer’s disease, vascular dementia, cancer (now in remission), anxiety, and elevated calcium, with occasional mysteries arising.
These two books invite you to experience day-to-day life, the trials, joys, and heartaches, of the world of spouse caregiving. I hopes I can be a connection to understanding that I wished I had found earlier in our journey. I hope caregivers will become aware of what might be ahead for them.
Using creative initiative, I felt compelled to tell our stories to unmask the role of caregiver. Knowing there were millions of stories to be told, my wish was to share a glimpse of our world to those who were also untrained and anxious. I hoped to help caregivers strengthen their own spirit, power and determination, while taking a swipe at the stigma, the fears and misunderstandings, that surround Alzheimer’s world.
Put your arms around your shoulders and squeeze…that’s a bear hug from me. -JAS
Annie B and Archie Bear are the source of bears and bear hugs associated with these books.
Currently, I am working through a course at McMaster University, Caregiver Essentials, to continue to improve my “knowledge, confidence, and overall health & well-being,” as I learn more of how it all impacts the role of a caregiver.
During the month of June -Myasthenia Gravis Awareness Month- I advocate for those challenged by Myasthenia Gravis with my Myasthenia Gravis Insights.com site. I have lived with MG since 1956 and feel I am qualified to support those with MG and the research toward finding a cure.
I graduated with a BA in Art from Colorado State University in 1965. Before being a caregiver, I was a website designer, a writer and art teacher and spent over forty-two years in sales, advertising and marketing for exhibit firms and the corporate world in the US, and then in Canada.
My two children are grown, my two grandchildren are in college! Currently, I live with My Love (and loving memory of our dearest little Miss Muffin) in Ontario, Canada.
~ jas 🍦
“About the Author” © 2019 Judith Allen Shone updated 2020
A DIFFERENT DRUMMER BOOKS
in Burlington, Ontario, can order my books, “Is There Any Ice Cream?” and “Did You Hide the Cookies?”
Drop in and ask Ian for a copy of both books in the series.
Also available to order from:
Barnes & Noble
from Amazon and online booksellers.
😊 Consider asking your library to order the book, possibly through their online ‘Request a Book‘ form or use our form, or make a phone call. So many more caregivers can be exposed to the world of caregiving to reduce their fears and help them find their courage if we help libraries be part of the educational chain of care. Our stories do help. Thank you. 😊